Smile and maintain eye contact: It is first because it's the most important. Men in surveys have claimed that the sexiest feature on a woman is a smile- because it makes them think they have a chance- right off the bat. Even if you aren't interested in who you're smiling at or who is catching your eye- its still good practice. How many times do you pass someone on the street and you look down so you don't catch their eyes? Why do we do this? It is important to be the one who has their head up and even if it's a small little smile- it will change so much. Smiling, like yawning, is addictive and entices curiosity- they will want to know what we are smiling at.
Have a Cheery Disposition: Yes Mary Poppins- its time to show our pleasant side. It follows the smile because in order to smile, we must show happiness. We choose our mood every morning we wake up and we choose how we portray it. Letting life get us down will eventually let life get us down. When talking to someone of the opposite sex, they don't want to hear how bad our life is. The complaints and the trivialities of the day only cause a poor reflection. Everyone on this planet has good days and bad days, we are not unique. What is unique is that even if we ARE have a bad day- we don't let show. The worse the day is- the more we should act pleasant and smile. We're masters of faking it by now right?
Don't Show Off: We're intelligent, we're successful, we own and pay off a mortgage on our own. We don't have to brag about it. Jackie Onassis, one of the icons of leading ladies, always kept her full talents to herself until it was time to reveal them- certainly not on first meetings or dates. I am not advocating dumbing down either, just not highlighting our own personal attributes right off the bat. Let them show us why they are good enough for us, instead of us constantly trying to prove how good we are for them. If they are keepers, they will WANT to discover us and it will be part of the fun and the challenge to slowly reveal the wonderful goddesses that we are.
Make Them Feel Special, Don't play Coy: Although one of our games is to make a man like us by showing him how special we are to OTHER men, this can very often backfire by him not feeling that our little "show" is for his benefit. He might think that if we're so interested in every other guy, there is no way we can be interested in him OR that he wouldn't want that kind of girl. If we catch a guy's attention that we are interested in, we should let him know by body language, conversation, and attention. Put yourself in his shoes: would you like the guy you thought was interested in you buying drinks for other girls? Not really. Unless of course he bought us one..and it was the "special" drink made only for us.
Stay Classy San Diego: Most men's first impressions of women are of their sisters and mothers, or other close family members. When they are really interested in finding someone to date, the 'good' ones will tend to choose someone that they can see in the same light as the other strong women models in their lives. Maintaining our dignity, while showing our sense of humor, and flirting is all a very complicated dance, but in the end its worth it. We should be holding our head high: showing our poise, humility and humor. Guys may chase ass, but what they really want is class.
Let's NOT talk about Sex Baby: Along with staying classy is refraining from mentioning all of our past sexual histories. While we may really want it, need it, crave it, its not fitting to talk about it right off the bat. In my experience, this opens the door to a guy thinking that because you're talking about sex in front of him, you're talking about the kind of sex you would want to have WITH him. It takes away the mystery. This is not lying about your past- its diverting the topic to something more suitable. Men always have it on their mind and they are like two year olds in that they will push the boundaries. I have found this as true in 23 year olds as in 40 year olds.
Dance, Dance, Dance: Not for them, for you. Being spontaneous, fun, silly- just because we are beautiful creatures on this planet. Trust me, they are watching
Hold out for what you want: Whether what you want is to have a first date that is dinner instead of coffee somewhere, or the phone call in the next few days. If you make the connection, never take his phone number, always give him yours. This is one of the tricks men in this east coast area try to play. "I like you, call me." Obviously they've been watching too much TV or playing too many political war games. If you are interested in me, call ME. Even if I like you, take my number still. We shouldn't have to chase, even if it is us making the first move. I know that sounds oxymoronic but its true. It has always been true, if we give them our number (except when very intoxicated) it usually means we like them in some way. Its up to them to act on it.
Don't over think it: I'm as guilty of this as any other woman out there right now. Its our trademark- we over think everything to the point of distraction. Was that glance he made at me ..or was he just looking for the bathroom. We love to torture ourselves with the "what if's" and the "what could have been's". Just like smiling when we're having a bad day- ignoring these dangerous paths of sabotage are very difficult. Here's the catch though- "they" aren't over thinking it. Sure, they might give us a thought or two, think about how nice we looked, or what we said, but they aren't in the locker room gabbing to the guy next to them about whether they came on too strong or not.
Believe in Yourself: Confidence is sexy. We all know this when we go out man hunting- we don't go out looking for spineless (even if they turn out that way). Well neither do men. Trust yourself and know that you're someone special and worthy of everything you want. Any guy would be lucky to have you. And if you can't find that you're doubting that, refer to number 1, smile and fake it till you believe it.
